The mistake that people make in stand-up is thinking they’re profound or they’re deep when — Colin Quinn
You know, the funny thing about lorne and that show is that, you can go over one million things — Colin Quinn
I don’t know any comedian who tailors his act to his audience. Maybe people say they do, but I can’t even imagine them. — Colin Quinn
I get the impression the english kings were witty, for some reason. I feel like all you had was your wit. — Colin Quinn
I think helen of troy must have been pretty hot. She got two countries going crazy for 10 years over her. — Colin Quinn
I think if you try to tailor your act to anybody, you end up with an act that doesn’t work anyway. — Colin Quinn
I’m always working on stuff. But they never materialize. I’m always working on movies and tv shows. — Colin Quinn
I’m quietly becoming new york’s premiere actor. People don’t understand. They have me pigeon-holed as a comedian. — Colin Quinn
I’ve been to japan, I’ve been to china, I’ve been to africa, I’ve been to the middle east — Colin Quinn
If I had to give up everything else and keep just one aspect of the job, I’d have to keep writing because I love it. — Colin Quinn
Marie antoinette was funny, I’m sure she was just misinterpreted. You know the ‘let them eat cake’ line. — Colin Quinn
People’s – most people’s job is talking about the future or like money not even in the present tense. — Colin Quinn
So instead of talking about theoretical ways of ending the war and violence, I say that we — Colin Quinn
They don’t tell you of course what we found out, an examined life not that fascinating either. — Colin Quinn
The thing that drives me crazy is when comics say ‘i have low self-esteem.’ no you don’t. — Colin Quinn
You can’t make everybody laugh. You gotta just do what you think is funny. Just be obstreperous to everybody. — Colin Quinn
You can’t make money on broadway. You make nothing. You maybe make like $1,350 a week after you pay out all the producers. — Colin Quinn