The doctor looked my body over. I said: Is there any hope? He said: Yes. Reincarnation. — Phyllis Diller
I realize it is normal to argue. I almost missed World War II watching my parents fight. — Phyllis Diller
My timing is so precise a heckler would have to make an appointment just to get a word in. — Phyllis Diller
I’m the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night… and reduce the crime rate. — Phyllis Diller