Funny Stories

The Best Funny Stories. Use image quotations as wallpapers, backgrounds to help inspire and keep pushing forward towards your dreams.

Image, The perfect couple

Funny Stories, Moral Stories, Stories

Once there was a perfect man who met a perfect woman. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve this perfect couple was driving along a winding road when they noticed someone at the roadside in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the... Read more »

Image, Your job doesn’t always define you

Funny Stories, Moral Stories, Stories

A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly, the plane developed engine trouble. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot grabbed a parachute and yelled to the passengers that they better jump, and he himself bailed out. Unfortunately, there were only three parachutes remaining. The doctor grabbed one and said “I’m a doctor, I save lives, so I must live,” and jumped out. The lawyer then said, “I’m a lawyer and lawyers are the... Read more »

Image, Daughter’s letter to mother.

Funny Stories, Stories

Dear mum, I am writing you this note to say that I haven’t been honest to you lately. I have a boyfriend, his name is Dragon and he lives in a trailer in the woods he wears biker clothes and deals Ecstasy. I am moving in with him and I am four months pregnant. His friends will come over all the time so I can get a little frisky with them. We will make a living out of growing drugs and selling them to Dragons friends as are both already drug addicts, we will live a life of drugs and... Read more »

Image, Why do men die first?

Funny Stories, Stories

This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries, but, now we know. It requires a bit of explanation. (Don't take the following to heart LOL :P) => If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you're a male chauvinist. => If you stay home and do the housework, you're a pansy. => If you work too hard, there's never any time for her. => If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum. => If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation. If you... Read more »