I’m not going to throw away the hand of friendship to suit 100 Trotskyites in Glasgow. — Billy Connolly
I don’t have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. — Billy Connolly
I loved japan. I used to read a lot about it when I was a child. And I always wanted to go. — Billy Connolly
I have been made redundant before and it is a terrible blow; redundant is a rotten word — Billy Connolly
My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the william tell overture — Billy Connolly
It seems to me that islam and christianity and judaism all have the same God, and he’s — Billy Connolly
I’ve always wanted to go to switzerland to see what the army does with those wee red knives. — Billy Connolly
The great thing about glasgow is that if there’s a nuclear attack it’ll look exactly the same afterwards. — Billy Connolly
The only time I would like to see was the 20s and 30s in america because I love the music — Billy Connolly
Behind the proscenium arch, you can’t always hear what people in the audience are saying. — Billy Connolly
I’ve always been fascinated by the difference between the jokes you can tell your friends but you can’t tell to an audience. — Billy Connolly
As soon as I got successful, the scottish press started picking on me. It’s something they reserve just for me. — Billy Connolly
Don’t tell me how to do my job. I don’t come to your workplace and tell you how to sweep up. — Billy Connolly