All this fuss about sleeping together. For physical pleasure I’d sooner go to my dentist any day. — Evelyn Waugh
Art is the symbol of the two noblest human efforts: to construct and to refrain from destruction. — Evelyn Waugh
Don’t hold your parents up to contempt. After all, you are their son, and it is just possible that you may take after them. — Evelyn Waugh
He was gifted with the sly, sharp instinct for self-preservation that passes for wisdom among the rich. — Evelyn Waugh
I haven’t been to sleep for over a year. That’s why I go to bed early. One needs more rest if one doesn’t sleep. — Evelyn Waugh
I think to be oversensitive about cliches is like being oversensitive about table manners. — Evelyn Waugh
If we can’t stamp out literature in the country, we can at least stop its being brought in from outside. — Evelyn Waugh
Instead of this absurd division into sexes they ought to class people as static and dynamic. — Evelyn Waugh
It is a curious thing… that every creed promises a paradise which will be absolutely uninhabitable for anyone of civilized taste. — Evelyn Waugh
Money is only useful when you get rid of it. It is like the odd card in “old maid”; the player who is finally left with it has lost. — Evelyn Waugh
My unhealthy affection for my second daughter has waned. Now I despise all my seven children equally. — Evelyn Waugh
News is what a chap who doesn’t care much about anything wants to read. And it’s only news until he’s read it. After that it’s dead. — Evelyn Waugh
One forgets words as one forgets names. One’s vocabulary needs constant fertilizing or it will die. — Evelyn Waugh
Let them not be quite forgotten at the throne of God when the simple come into their kingdom. — Evelyn Waugh
Professional reviewers read so many bad books in the course of duty that they get an unhealthy craving for arresting phrases. — Evelyn Waugh
The human mind is inspired enough when it comes to inventing horrors; it is when it tries to invent a heaven that it shows itself cloddish. — Evelyn Waugh
We class schools into four grades: leading school, first-rate school, good school and school. — Evelyn Waugh