Zsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house. — Henny Youngman
I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase. — Henny Youngman
She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, “Am I too late for the garbage?” “No, jump in!” — Henny Youngman
Some people play a horse to win, some to place. I should have bet this horse to live. — Henny Youngman