When I go to a restaurant I always ask the manager, “Give me a table near a waiter.” — Henny Youngman
Los Angeles is peopled by waiters and carpenters and drivers who are there to be actors. — Patrick Duffy
Editors may think of themselves as dignified headwaiters in a well-run restaurant — Thomas B. Griffith
Why can’t teachers end up owning schools, the way waiters can open their own restaurants? — Peter Brimelow
Hold the newsreader’s nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers — Stephen Fry