Jim Gaffigan Quotes

As a dad, you are the Vice President of the executive branch Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

As a dad, you are the Vice President of the executive branch

— Jim Gaffigan

You never want to be the worst bowler of the group-because then Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

You never want to be the worst bowler of the group-because then

— Jim Gaffigan

New York has made me so paranoid, too. Whenever I visit another Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

New York has made me so paranoid, too. Whenever I visit another

— Jim Gaffigan

I was always told that Hoosier came from when settlers in the Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I was always told that Hoosier came from when settlers in the

— Jim Gaffigan

You can’t tell me the success of Kevin Bacon isn’t somehow tied Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

You can’t tell me the success of Kevin Bacon isn’t somehow tied

— Jim Gaffigan

On MySpace … the whole demographic of the stand-up comedy fan has changed. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

On MySpace … the whole demographic of the stand-up comedy fan has changed.

— Jim Gaffigan

Twitter allowed me to talk about parenting in short snippets and find Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Twitter allowed me to talk about parenting in short snippets and find

— Jim Gaffigan

When people look and decide they have nothing in common with me Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

When people look and decide they have nothing in common with me

— Jim Gaffigan

There’s something that’s really fun about the challenge of making the mundane Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

There’s something that’s really fun about the challenge of making the mundane

— Jim Gaffigan

Playing frisbee with a five year old is amazingly similar to chasing after a frisbee. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Playing frisbee with a five year old is amazingly similar to chasing after a frisbee.

— Jim Gaffigan

I saw this college team bowling championship. Each team had their own Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I saw this college team bowling championship. Each team had their own

— Jim Gaffigan

I’ve been doing theaters like the Warner for about a year and Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I’ve been doing theaters like the Warner for about a year and

— Jim Gaffigan

I only dated one Asian girl, but she was very Asian. She was a panda. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I only dated one Asian girl, but she was very Asian. She was a panda.

— Jim Gaffigan

I think when my mother died, it was such a – you Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I think when my mother died, it was such a – you

— Jim Gaffigan

I’m a comedian, which is the opposite of a lifestyle that equips you to be a parent. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I’m a comedian, which is the opposite of a lifestyle that equips you to be a parent.

— Jim Gaffigan

Stand-up is an amazing art form, I think, because it’s all about Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Stand-up is an amazing art form, I think, because it’s all about

— Jim Gaffigan

I would say my return to my faith is – it’s a very personal thing. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I would say my return to my faith is – it’s a very personal thing.

— Jim Gaffigan

You ever get a postcard, you get so excited you don’t even Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

You ever get a postcard, you get so excited you don’t even

— Jim Gaffigan

Television’s very much a writer’s medium, as it probably should be, but Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Television’s very much a writer’s medium, as it probably should be, but

— Jim Gaffigan

My wife and I, we work together. And we wrote this book, “ Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

My wife and I, we work together. And we wrote this book, “

— Jim Gaffigan

Don’t you think it’s strange how many referees work at Footlocker? Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Don’t you think it’s strange how many referees work at Footlocker?

— Jim Gaffigan

I always seem to be chosen to do very flattering things like Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I always seem to be chosen to do very flattering things like

— Jim Gaffigan

The Thanksgiving tradition is, we gorge. Hey, what about at Thanksgiving we Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

The Thanksgiving tradition is, we gorge. Hey, what about at Thanksgiving we

— Jim Gaffigan

Sometimes being lazy can get you in trouble. You ever not take Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Sometimes being lazy can get you in trouble. You ever not take

— Jim Gaffigan

The idea of being a practicing Catholic, it’s – for me, it’s Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

The idea of being a practicing Catholic, it’s – for me, it’s

— Jim Gaffigan

Babies, they learn how to walk and they are already trying to Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Babies, they learn how to walk and they are already trying to

— Jim Gaffigan

Deep frying a Twinkie makes it healthy, right? Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Deep frying a Twinkie makes it healthy, right?

— Jim Gaffigan

I would say that now I’m somebody who goes to church. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I would say that now I’m somebody who goes to church.

— Jim Gaffigan

I think it’s important to control your opportunities, because in the entertainment Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I think it’s important to control your opportunities, because in the entertainment

— Jim Gaffigan

It’s strange how interesting your dreams are, but when someone tries to Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

It’s strange how interesting your dreams are, but when someone tries to

— Jim Gaffigan

Gyms are always packed. The only machine available is the one that Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Gyms are always packed. The only machine available is the one that

— Jim Gaffigan

Well my chocolate is so good I could sell it in an obnoxious prism shape. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Well my chocolate is so good I could sell it in an obnoxious prism shape.

— Jim Gaffigan

Manhattan’s probably one of the bluest parts in the country, and Indiana’s Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Manhattan’s probably one of the bluest parts in the country, and Indiana’s

— Jim Gaffigan

I grew up in Sheepshead Bay. Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I grew up in Sheepshead Bay.

— Jim Gaffigan

Comedians kind of write what comes to them. You can give yourself Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Comedians kind of write what comes to them. You can give yourself

— Jim Gaffigan

I’ve been doing stand-up for so long, I think 19 years, that I Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I’ve been doing stand-up for so long, I think 19 years, that I

— Jim Gaffigan

I’d been acting and doing stand-up in New York about eight years, Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I’d been acting and doing stand-up in New York about eight years,

— Jim Gaffigan

I do have some Catholic stuff that is done from the perspective Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I do have some Catholic stuff that is done from the perspective

— Jim Gaffigan

I was able to make the jump to theaters without having a Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

I was able to make the jump to theaters without having a

— Jim Gaffigan

Whatever a writer gets paid for his book, it’s never enough. I Jim Gaffigan Picture Quote

Whatever a writer gets paid for his book, it’s never enough. I

— Jim Gaffigan

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